


Hamilton Watches Hamilton

by 55935



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alexander Hamilton/Elizabeth Schuyler - Freeform, F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-10
Updated: 2020-06-23
Packaged: 2020-08-14 04:37:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,928
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20186383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/55935/pseuds/55935
Summary: Title says it all lmao





	1. Alexander Hamilton

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! I've always wanted to write a ham watches ham fic.

**[AARON BURR]**  
**How does a bastard, orphan, son of a whore and a**  
**Scotsman, dropped in the middle of a forgotten**  
**Spot in the Caribbean by providence, impoverished, in squalor**  
**Grow up to be a hero and a scholar?**

Burr: I don't know, but I have a feeling we're about to find out.

Hamilton: Oh cool! I was a hero?

Philip: You have always been a hero to me, pops.

Hamilton: This kid! I swear some day he will blow us all away.

**[JOHN LAURENS]**  
**The ten-dollar Founding Father without a father**  
**Got a lot farther by working a lot harder**  
**By being a lot smarter**  
**By being a self-starter**  
**By fourteen, they placed him in charge of a trading charter**

Laurens: Damn, dude. What the hell. Is there anything you can't do?

Hamilton: My dear Laurens. The answer to that is no. I am in fact awsome.

**[THOMAS JEFFERSON]**  
**And every day while slaves were being slaughtered and carted**  
**Away across the waves, he struggled and kept his guard up**  
**Inside, he was longing for something to be a part of**  
**The brother was ready to beg, steal, borrow, or barter**

Jefferson: You know that's illegal, right?

Hamilton: Shhhh Don't ruin my reputation.

Jefferson: Yes, because your bastard, orphan, son of a whore reputation is saying great things about you.

**[JAMES MADISON]**  
**Then a hurricane came, and devastation reigned**  
**Our man saw his future drip, dripping down the drain**  
**Put a pencil to his temple, connected it to his brain**  
**And he wrote his first refrain, a testament to his pain**

Hamilton: Actualy it was a quill, thank you very much.

**[BURR]**  
**Well, the word got around, they said, “This kid is insane, man”**  
**Took up a collection just to send him to the mainland**  
**“Get your education, don’t forget from whence you came, and**  
**The world's gonna know your name. What’s your name, man?”**

Hamilton: Yo, I'm Alex!

**[ALEXANDER HAMILTON]**  
**Alexander Hamilton**  
**My name is Alexander Hamilton**  
**And there's a million things I haven't done**  
**But just you wait, just you wait...**

Hamilton: Hey, isn't that Burr's line? The whole wait for it thing? I never wait for it. I get what I want when I want it and no later. 

**[ELIZA HAMILTON]**  
**When he was ten his father split, full of it, debt-ridden**  
**Two years later, see Alex and his mother bed-ridden**  
**Half-dead sittin' in their own sick, the scent thick**

Eliza: Such a tragic tale...

**[FULL COMPANY EXCEPT HAMILTON (whispering)]**  
**And Alex got better but his mother went quick**

Hamilton: Mama...

**[GEORGE WASHINGTON & COMPANY, BOTH]**  
**Moved in with a cousin, the cousin committed suicide**  
**Left him with nothin' but ruined pride, something new inside**  
**A voice saying**  
**“Alex, you gotta fend for yourself.”**  
**He started retreatin' and readin' every treatise on the shelf**

Laurens: Damn, is that why you are so smart, Alex?

Washington: That's why I made him my right hand man and we won the war. Thanks for that by the way, Alexander. 

**[BURR & COMPANY, BOTH]**  
**There would have been nothin’ left to do**  
**For someone less astute**  
**He woulda been dead or destitute**  
**Without a cent of restitution**  
**Started workin', clerkin' for his late mother's landlord**  
**Tradin’ sugar cane and rum and all the things he can’t afford**  
**Scammin' for every book he can get his hands on**  
**Plannin' for the future see him now as he stands on (ooh)**  
**The bow of a ship headed for a new land**  
**In New York you can be a new man**

Burr: It's a miracle that you have survived this long, Hamilton. Then you rose to the top and found your place in New York.

Hamilton: Yes, I know. I am quite amazing.

Burr: Will you shut up and just accept the damn compliment?

**[COMPANY & HAMILTON, WOMEN, MEN]**  
**In New York you can be a new man (Just you wait)**  
**In New York you can be a new man (Just you wait)**  
**In New York you can be a new man**  
**In New York, New York**  
**Just you wait!**

Hamilton: This is so catchy.

**[COMPANY]**  
**Alexander Hamilton (Alexander Hamilton)**  
**We are waiting in the wings for you (waiting in the wings for you)**  
**You could never back down**  
**You never learned to take your time!**  
**Oh, Alexander Hamilton (Alexander Hamilton)**  
**When America sings for you**  
**Will they know what you overcame?**  
**Will they know you rewrote the game?**  
**The world will never be the same, oh**

Washington: They are right. Alexander truely has made his mark on this world and there is no turning back. History is watching his every move.

**[BURR, MEN, & COMPANY]**  
**The ship is in the harbor now**  
**See if you can spot him**  
**Just you wait**  
**Another immigrant**  
**Comin’ up from the bottom**  
**Just you wait**  
**His enemies destroyed his rep**  
**America forgot him**

Hamilton: Wait, what?! All that work for nothing?!

Laurens: Sorry, Alex.

**[MULLIGAN/MADISON & LAFAYETTE/JEFFERSON]**  
**We fought with him**

Hamilton: Ayy my brothers are by my side always!

**[LAURENS/PHILIP]**  
**Me? I died for him**

Hamilton: Oh god, no.

Laurens: Sorry, Alex. But I hope that we died for a good cause.

Philip: This might be a bad time, pops, but why do I look so much like John Laurens?

Hamilton: ...

**[WASHINGTON]**  
**Me? I trusted him**

Hamilton: Whoa, trusted as in past tense. What's that supposed to mean?!

Washington: ...

**[ELIZA & ANGELICA & PEGGY/MARIA]**  
**Me? I loved him**

Burr: Why do you get all them womens?

Eliza: Yeah, you said you were mine. I thought you were mine.

Hamilton: I am yours, my dear Elizabeth Schuyler ;)

**[BURR]**  
**And me? I'm the damn fool that shot him**

Hamilton: Burr! How could you! I thought we were friends!

Burr: I don't know! But sorry?

**[COMPANY]**  
**There's a million things I haven’t done**  
**But just you wait!**

Hamilton: Yeah, I'm still waiting for my legacy...if, you know...Burr doesn't try to take my life first.

Burr: I said I'm sorry!

**[BURR]**  
**What's your name, man?**

Hamilton: It's Alex!

**[COMPANY]**  
**Alexander Hamilton!**


	2. Aaron Burr, Sir

**[COMPANY]**   
**1776\. New York City**

**[HAMILTON]**   
**Pardon me. Are you Aaron Burr, sir?**

Burr: Oh god...Not this.

Hamilton: ;)

**[BURR]**   
**That depends. Who’s asking?**

Hamilton: Oh, you know, just the boy who's going to do better than you in life.

**[HAMILTON]**   
**Oh, well, sure, sir**   
**I’m Alexander Hamilton, I’m at your service, sir**   
**I have been looking for you**

Burr: Because that is totally not at all creepy.

**[BURR]**   
**I’m getting nervous**

Burr: As well I should be.

**[HAMILTON]**   
**Sir…**   
**I heard your name at Princeton. I was seeking an accelerated course of study when I got sort of out of sorts with a buddy of yours. I may have punched him. It’s a blur, sir. He handles the financials?**

Burr: Hamilton, why must you always go out looking for a fight?

Hamilton: Hey! In my defense, he had it coming. He only had himself to blame.

Burr: Wrong musical.

**[BURR]**   
**You punched the bursar**

Burr: Sweet jesus...

**[HAMILTON]**   
**Yes!**   
**I wanted to do what you did. Graduate in two, then join the revolution. He looked at me like I was stupid, I’m not stupid**

Hamilton: Well, that's fairly obvious by the 51 essays I wrote. Thanks by the way, James Madison and John Jay.

**So how’d you do it? How’d you graduate so fast?**

Burr: A lot of hard work and dedication for what I do.

**[BURR]**   
**It was my parents’ dying wish before they passed**

Burr: Yes, and that.

**[HAMILTON]**   
**You’re an orphan. Of course! I’m an orphan**   
**God, I wish there was a war!**   
**Then we could prove that we’re worth more**   
**Than anyone bargained for…**

Hamilton: Yeah...I'm begining to wish that I hadn't wished for a war.

**[BURR]**   
**Can I buy you a drink?**

**[HAMILTON]**   
**That would be nice**

**[BURR]**   
**While we’re talking, let me offer you some free advice**   
**Talk less**

Hamilton: What?! Have you even met me, Burr?!

Burr: Not at this time, no, but I could already tell that I didn't like you. 

Hamilton: So mean.

**[HAMILTON]**   
**What?**

**[BURR]**   
**Smile more**

Hamilton: Yeah because I have sooo much to smile about. You know, my dad leaving my mom and I alone without financial support. Us getting sick and my mom dying. My cousin commiting suicide. That hurricane that totally turned my world upside down leaving me to fend for myself. Yeah, other than that, I have a lot to be happy about. My life totally hasn't been hell.

Burr: ...Damn that was depressing...

**[HAMILTON]**   
**Ha**

**[BURR]**   
**Don’t let them know what you’re against or what you’re for**

Hamilton: Oh what a surprise. Aaron Byrr doesn't have any opinions....again.

Burr: Why are you like this...?

**[HAMILTON]**   
**You can’t be serious**

Burr: I'm always serious, Alexander Hamilton.

**[BURR]**   
**You wanna get ahead?**

Hamilton: Well...duh.

**[HAMILTON]**   
**Yes**

**[BURR]**   
**Fools who run their mouths off wind up dead**

Hamilton: And yet, I'm still alive.

Burr: I swear on my life, Hamilton, that some day I will shoot you.

Hamilton: According to this musical about our history, I don't doubt it.

**[LAURENS]**   
**Yo yo yo yo yo!**   
**What time is it?**

Laurens: Hopefully it's lunch time. I'm hungry.

**[LAURENS/LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN]**   
**Show time!**

Hamilton: But we're already at the show!

**[BURR]**   
**Like I said…**

Hamilton: Oh were you talking, Burr. I stopped listening to you ever since you took me into this bar.

**[LAURENS]**   
**Show time! Show time! Yo!**   
**I’m John Laurens in the place to be!**   
**Two pints o’ Sam Adams, but I’m workin’ on three, uh!**   
**Those redcoats don’t want it with me!**   
**Cuz I will pop chick-a pop these cops till I’m free!**

Jefferson: B-But! That's also illegal! 

Hamilton: Shut up, Jefferson.

**[LAFAYETTE]**   
**Oui oui, mon ami, je m’appelle Lafayette!**   
**The Lancelot of the revolutionary set!**   
**I came from afar just to say “Bonsoir!”**   
**Tell the King “Casse toi!” Who’s the best?**   
**C’est moi!**

Hamilton: Hey, Lafayette, has anyone ever told you how you look a lot like Thomas?

Lafayette: Oui, mon ami. All ze time.

**[MULLIGAN]**   
**Brrrah brraaah! I am Hercules Mulligan**   
**Up in it, lovin’ it, yes I heard ya mother said “Come again?”**

Hamilton: I don't have a mother.

Burr: I don't either.

Mulligan: Aw shit, dude. Sorry.

**[LAFAYETTE & LAURENS]**   
**Ayyyyy**

**[MULLIGAN]**   
**Lock up ya daughters and horses, of course**   
**It’s hard to have intercourse over four sets of corsets…**

Laurens: Wow...

**[LAFAYETTE]**   
**Wow**

**[LAURENS]**   
**No more sex, pour me another brew, son!**   
**Let’s raise a couple more…**

**[LAURENS/LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN]**   
**To the revolution!**

**[LAURENS]**   
**Well, if it ain’t the prodigy of Princeton college!**

**[MULLIGAN]**   
**Aaron Burr!**

**[LAURENS]**   
**Give us a verse, drop some knowledge!**

BurrL Finally someone who can see my brilliance.

**[BURR]**   
**Good luck with that: you’re takin’ a stand**   
**You spit. I’m ‘a sit. We’ll see where we land**

Hamilton: Ayy, Burr, who knew you could rap?

**[LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN]**   
**Boooo!**

**[LAURENS]**   
**Burr, the revolution’s imminent. What do you stall for?**

**[HAMILTON]**   
**If you stand for nothing, Burr, what’ll you fall for?**

Burr: Ah Hamilton. You can never learn to talk less and smile more. You always must speak your mind. Even if it means interrupting someone when they are about to speak.

Hamilton: Oh please. It's not like you would have had a valid answer to give anyway.

**[MULLIGAN/LAFAYETTE/LAURENS]**   
**Ooh**   
**Who you?**   
**Who you?**   
**Who are you?**

**[MULLIGAN/LAFAYETTE/LAURENS]**   
**Ooh, who is this kid? What’s he gonna do?**

Hamilton: My name is Alexander Hamilton. And I will do great things, just you wait and see. I will die for my legacy!


	3. My Shot

**[HAMILTON]**   
**I am not throwing away my shot!**   
**I am not throwing away my shot!**   
**Hey yo, I’m just like my country**   
**I’m young, scrappy and hungry**   
**And I’m not throwing away my shot!**

Hamilton: I really like the beat to this...

  
**I’m ‘a get a scholarship to King’s College**   
**I prob’ly shouldn’t brag, but dag, I amaze and astonish**   
**The problem is I got a lot of brains but no polish**   
**I gotta holler just to be heard**   
**With every word, I drop knowledge!**

Hamilton: This is the truth! I have so much to say but some people *couph Jefferson couph* won't listen to my views.

Jefferson: Hey! I listen to your views and opinions...I just think they're dumb.

  
**I’m a diamond in the rough, a shiny piece of coal**   
**Tryin’ to reach my goal. My power of speech: unimpeachable**   
**Only nineteen but my mind is older**   
**These New York City streets get colder, I shoulder**   
**Ev’ry burden, ev’ry disadvantage**   
**I have learned to manage, I don’t have a gun to brandish**   
**I walk these streets famished**

Hamilton: I have written my way to the top, and I don't plan to stop.

Laurens: Um, is this whole rhyming about history thing starting to get to you? 

Hamilton: What? Why would you say that, my dear Jonathan?

Laurens: T-That's not even my name...

  
**The plan is to fan this spark into a flame**   
**But damn, it’s getting dark, so let me spell out the name**   
**I am the—**

**[HAMILTON/LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN/LAURENS]**   
**A-L-E-X-A-N-D**   
**E-R—we are—meant to be…**

Hamilton: And where we're meant to be is in history.

Laurens: ...Stop

**[HAMILTON]**   
**A colony that runs independently**   
**Meanwhile, Britain keeps shittin’ on us endlessly**   
**Essentially, they tax us relentlessly**   
**Then King George turns around, runs a spending spree**   
**He ain’t ever gonna set his descendants free**   
**So there will be a revolution in this century**   
**Enter me!**

Hamilton: Oh, yes please do enter me.

Laurens: ...

Eliza: ALEX! NOT IN FRONT OF PHILIP!

Philip: Well...That answers my previous question. Thanks for these freckles, John.

Laurens: ...

**[LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN/LAURENS]**   
**(He says in parentheses)**

**[HAMILTON]**   
**Don’t be shocked when your hist’ry book mentions me**   
**I will lay down my life if it sets us free**   
**Eventually, you’ll see my ascendancy**

Hamilton: I will die for my legacy!!!!

**[HAMILTON & LAURENS]**   
**And I am not throwing away**   
**My shot (my shot)**   
**I am not throwing away**   
**My shot (my shot)**   
**Hey yo, I’m just like my country**   
**I’m young, scrappy and hungry**   
**And I’m not throwing away my shot**   
**And I'm not throwing away my shot**

Hamilton: Hey, the melody's back

**[HAMILTON/MULLIGAN/LAURENS/LAFAYETTE]**   
**I am not throwing away my shot**   
**I am not throwing away my shot**   
**Hey yo, I’m just like my country**   
**I’m young, scrappy and hungry**   
**And I’m not throwing away my shot**   
**It’s time to take a shot!**

**[LAFAYETTE]**   
**I dream of life without a monarchy**   
**The unrest in France will lead to ‘onarchy?**   
**‘Onarchy? How you say, how you say, ‘anarchy?’**   
**When I fight, I make the other side panicky**   
**With my—**

**[HAMILTON/LAURENS/LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN]**   
**Shot!**

Hamilton: Your english is very good, my dear friend Lafayette.

Lafayette: Merci, mon ami. ton français est très bien aussi (Your french is very good as well)

Philip: I can count to nine in french!

Lafayette: Splendid! You must have a way with words just like your father.

Philip: Well duh...I'm a poet!

**[MULLIGAN]**   
**Yo, I’m a tailor’s apprentice**   
**And I got y’all knuckleheads in loco parentis**   
**I’m joining the rebellion cuz I know it’s my chance**   
**To socially advance, instead of sewin’ some pants!**   
**I’m gonna take a—**

**[HAMILTON/LAURENS/LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN]**   
**Shot!**

Mulligan: Ayyyy I'm gonna sew all dem pants

**[LAURENS]**   
**But we’ll never be truly free**   
**Until those in bondage have the same rights as you and me**   
**You and I. Do or die. Wait till I sally in**   
**On a stallion with the first black battalion**   
**Have another—**

**[HAMILTON/LAURENS/LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN]**   
**Shot!**

Laurens: It's true! If I die, I die fighting. Alongside Alex who is the closest friend I got.

Hamilton: Laurens, you are so god damn hot.

Eliza: I AM THE MOTHER OF YOUR CHILDREN!

**[BURR]**   
**Geniuses, lower your voices**   
**You keep out of trouble and you double your choices**   
**I’m with you, but the situation is fraught**   
**You’ve got to be carefully taught:**   
**If you talk, you’re gonna get shot!**

Lafayette: You...are ze worst Burr.

Hamilton: Oh he just got BURRned.

Burr: ...Stop

**[HAMILTON]**   
**Burr, check what we got**   
**Mister Lafayette, hard rock like Lancelot**   
**I think your pants look hot**   
**Laurens, I like you a lot**   
**Let’s hatch a plot blacker than the kettle callin’ the pot...**   
**What are the odds the gods would put us all in one spot**   
**Poppin’ a squat on conventional wisdom, like it or not**   
**A bunch of revolutionary manumission abolitionists?**   
**Give me a position, show me where the ammunition is!**

Laurens: Jesus Alex! What the hell?!

Hamilton: ....I need help...

**Oh, am I talkin’ too loud?**   
**Sometimes I get over excited, shoot off at the mouth**   
**I never had a group of friends before**   
**I promise that I’ll make y’all proud**

**[LAURENS]**   
**Let’s get this guy in front of a crowd**

**[HAMILTON/LAURENS/LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN/ENSEMBLE]**   
**I am not throwing away my shot**   
**I am not throwing away my shot**   
**Hey yo, I’m just like my country**   
**I’m young, scrappy and hungry**   
**And I’m not throwing away my shot**

**I am not throwing away my shot**   
**I am not throwing away my shot**   
**Hey yo, I’m just like my country**   
**I’m young, scrappy and hungry**   
**And I’m not throwing away my shot**

**[LAURENS & HAMILTON/LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN]**   
**Ev’rybody sing:**   
**Whoa, whoa, whoa (whoa, whoa, whoa)**   
**Hey!**   
**Whoa (Whoa)**   
**Wooh!!**   
**Whoa! (Whoa)**   
**Said let ‘em hear ya! (Yea)**   
**Let’s go!**

**[LAURENS & COMPANY]**   
**Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!**   
**I said shout it to the rooftops!**   
**Whoa!**   
**Said, to the rooftops!**   
**Whoa!**   
**Come on!**   
**Yea**   
**Come on, let’s go!**

Hamilton: We got the whole god damn world involved in this!

Burr: You need professional help. Laurens, tell your boyfriend to shut up.

Laurens: WHAT?! WE'RE NOT TOGETHER!

Hamilton: Laurens, I want a divorce. Stop trying to seduce me.

Laurens: ...I swear to god if Burr doesn't shoot you, I will.

**[LAURENS]**   
**Rise up!**   
**When you’re living on your knees, you rise up**   
**Tell your brother that he’s gotta rise up**   
**Tell your sister that she's gotta rise up**

**[LAURENS AND ENSEMBLE & COMPANY]**   
**When are these colonies gonna rise up?**   
**Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!**   
**When are these colonies gonna rise up?**   
**Whoa**   
**When are these colonies gonna rise up?**   
**Whoa**   
**When are these colonies gonna rise up?**   
**Whoa**   
**Rise up! (Rise up!)**

**[HAMILTON]**   
**I imagine death so much it feels more like a memory**   
**When’s it gonna get me?**   
**In my sleep? Seven feet ahead of me?**   
**If I see it comin’, do I run or do I let it be?**   
**Is it like a beat without a melody?**   
**See, I never thought I’d live past twenty**   
**Where I come from some get half as many**   
**Ask anybody why we livin’ fast and we laugh, reach for a flask**   
**We have to make this moment last, that’s plenty**

Burr: What's up with these mood swings. Is it from the alcohol?

**Scratch that**   
**This is not a moment, it’s the movement**   
**Where all the hungriest brothers with**   
**Something to prove went?**   
**Foes oppose us, we take an honest stand**   
**We roll like Moses, claimin’ our promised land**   
**And? If we win our independence?**   
**Is that a guarantee of freedom for our descendants?**   
**Or will the blood we shed begin an endless**   
**Cycle of vengeance and death with no defendants?**   
**I know the action in the street is excitin’**   
**But Jesus, between all the bleedin’ ‘n fightin’**   
**I’ve been readin’ ‘n writin’**   
**We need to handle our financial situation**   
**Are we a nation of states? What’s the state of our nation?**   
**I’m past patiently waitin’**   
**I’m passionately smashin’ every expectation**   
**Every action’s an act of creation!**   
**I’m laughin’ in the face of casualties and sorrow**   
**For the first time, I’m thinkin’ past tomorrow**

Burr: You sound hella depressed.

Eliza: Don't be depressed. We all love you.

Jefferson: That's debatable.

Hamilton: You wanna fight?!

**[HAMILTON AND COMPANY]**   
**And I am not throwing away my shot**   
**I am not throwing away my shot**   
**Hey yo, I’m just like my country**   
**I’m young, scrappy and hungry**   
**And I’m not throwing away my shot**

**[HAMILTON/LAURENS/**   
**LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN & ENSEMBLE]**   
**We’re gonna rise up! Time to take a shot!**   
**Not throwing away my shot**   
**We’re gonna rise up! Time to take a shot!**   
**Not throwing away my shot**   
**We’re gonna**   
**We're gonna**

**[HAMILTON & ENSEMBLE]**   
**Time to take a shot! (Rise up)**

  
**[HAMILTON/LAFAYETTE/**   
**LAURENS/MULLIGAN & ENSEMBLE]**   
**Time to take a shot! (Rise up)**   
**Time to take a shot! (Rise up)**   
**Take a shot! Ri— ri— ri—**   
**Shot!**   
**Shot!**   
**A-yo it’s**   
**Time to take a shot! (Time to take a shot!)**   
**Time to take a shot! (Time to take a shot!)**   
**And I am— (And I am)**

**[HAMILTON/LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN/LAURENS]**   
**Not throwin’ away my—**

**[COMPANY]**   
**Not throwin’ away my shot!**

Laurens: ...Damn...


	4. The Story of Tonight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally got back to this!!! The formatting will be a bit different. Not too different though...
> 
> And if you can't tell, this fic is just crack at this point. There's literally no plot. None. At all. Don't even try to look for one. You won't find it!

**HAMILTON  
I may not live to see our glory!**

Hamilton: *couph* Um, pardon moi? 

Burr: HA!

**LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN/LAURENS  
I may not live to see our glory!**

Laf, Mulligan, Laurens: *Quietly sobbing in the background...*

**HAMILTON**   
**But I will gladly join the fight!**

Hamilton: Ummm, they just said I'm gonna die, sooooo...I wouldn't be too thrilled about joining THAT fight.

Burr: *Sighs under his breath* I am seriously gonna shoot this fool....

**LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN/LAURENS**   
**But I will gladly join the fight!**

Hamilton: Wow, aren't you guys original. Here is me giving a fabulous speech about our soon to be deaths, and y'all just repeating what I say!

Burr: ..."Y'all."

Hamilton: DON'T even start with me Mr. Trigger Happy.

**HAMILTON  
And when our children tell our story…**

Eliza: WOAH WOAH WOAH!!!!

Hamilton: *Looks away as everyone starts laughing*

**LAFAYETTE/MULLIGAN/LAURENS  
And when our children tell our story…**

*Everyone immediately stops laughing while Burr chokes on air (Hamilton secretly hoping it kills him)*

**HAMILTON  
They’ll tell the story of tonight.**

Hamilton: I don't think I like this story very much....

**MULLIGAN**   
**Let’s have another round tonight.**

**LAFAYETTE**   
**Let’s have another round tonight.**

**HAMILTON**   
**Let’s have another round tonight.**

Mulligan: Yep, we're drunk...

**LAURENS**   
**Raise a glass to freedom,**   
**Something they can never take away,**   
**no matter what they tell you.**   
**Raise a glass to the four of us.**

Hamilton: John...

John: Yeah, Alex?

Hamilton: That was probably the gayest shit you have ever said.

John: Um, Alex? There was nothing gay about that.

Mulligan: It came from you, dude. Everything that comes out of your mouth is gay.

Laf: And everything that goes IN your mouth

John: GUYS!

**LAURENS/MULLIGAN  
Tomorrow there’ll be more of us.**

John: No. Nononono. There will NOT be more of you two, you poor excuses of humans. I hope you all lose your thumbs

Everyone: ...

**MULLIGAN/LAFAYETTE/LAURENS**   
**Telling the story of tonight.**

**HAMILTON**   
**They’ll tell the story of tonight.**

**LAURENS/MULLIGAN/LAFAYETTE**   
**Raise a glass to freedom,**   
**something they can never take away.**

**HAMILTON**   
**No matter what they tell you.**

**MULLIGAN/LAFAYETTE**   
**Let’s have another round tonight.**

**LAURENS**   
**Raise a glass to the four of us.**

**HAMILTON/LAURENS/MULLIGAN/LAFAYETTE**   
**Tomorrow there’ll be more of us.**

**HAMILTON/LAURENS**   
**Telling the story of tonight**

**MULLIGAN/LAFAYETTE**   
**Let’s have another round tonight**

**HAMILTON/LAURENS/ENSEMBLE**   
**They’ll tell the story of tonight**   
**Raise a glass to freedom**   
**They’ll tell the story of tonight**   
**Raise a glass to freedom**   
**They’ll tell the story of tonight**   
**They’ll tell the story of-**

**FULL ENSEMBLE**   
**Tonight**

Hamilton: Aww how sweet. I can't help but feel like I'm in some kind of love triangle with John and Eliza. 

Laf: You're right, Alex. But there only one problem. I believe John is only gay for them turtles.

Hamilton: Oof. He's gotta stick with his own kind XD


End file.
